General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Do fathers still expect to be asked permission to marry their daughter? Is this a sexist tradition? [View all]haele
(12,652 posts)Or at least make an attempt to make acquaintance with them, unless the proposee is totally emancipated from the parents.
A good percentage of the attitudes - and dysfunctional tendencies - of the parents tend to be reflected in the children. Not always - but someone who grew up a child of a toxic parent or in a chaotic family structure might have a lot of triggers and boundary issues that someone who grew up the child of casual, accepting parents or in a stable, structured family might.
The sweeping emotions of Romantic Love may work to blind one to the other individual's faults, but the faults (or strengths) of the family the individual comes from is typically obvious, no matter how infatuated one may be. If one person has a cultural conflict with or otherwise can't stand the other person's family that comes with them, that can become an issue after the ring is on the finger and the courtship ends.
Family is part of the baggage that gets unpacked after the Honeymoon. It's important to figure out if it's light or heavy baggage before it gets packed in, or family can quickly become a huge interference in the maturing of couple's relationship.
Haele