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Member since: Sun Jan 1, 2017, 06:42 PM
Number of posts: 14,956

Journal Archives

I Can Move Through Space and Time!!!!

Post Your Corniest Joke

I'll begin with the joke my dad told me maybe 1,000 times and it never improved (yet here I am repeating it).

Q: Why couldn't you get any corn during the war?

A: Because all the colonels were in the army!

Ba dump pssshhhh

Scientists Discover Ancient 'Cthulhu' Fossil That Will Give You Nightmares

On Wednesday, an international team of researchers unveiled the fossilized remains of an ancient relative of the sea cucumber. It had 45 tentacles and lurked at the bottom of the seas some 430 million years ago.

They’ve dubbed it Sollasina cthulhu, after the tentacled Great Old One of H.P. Lovecraft’s weird tales, a study published in the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B said.

Unlike the massive Cthulhu of fiction, the creature unveiled by scientists this week was quite tiny, with the fossil measuring just about an inch across.

Despite its diminutive size, the creature still managed to pack a lot of nightmare fuel. Those 45 tentacles were used to snatch up food, creep along the ocean floor and scare off predators.

More (and pic!): https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/technology/scientists-discover-ancient-cthulhu-fossil-that-will-give-you-nightmares/ar-BBVNcgE?ocid=se

How Much Sleep Do You "Need", And Has It Changed Over Time?

I keep hearing how, as you get older, you need less sleep. I have not found that to be the case with me. I have also heard of people who only "need" two or three hours of sleep a night to be fully functional (and they only sleep a few hours a day for years).

And just for funzies, have you ever tried first and second sleep? Here is a fact filled article about it: Humans Used to Sleep in Two Shifts, And Maybe We Should Do It Again https://www.sciencealert.com/humans-used-to-sleep-in-two-shifts-maybe-we-should-again

So what say you about your sleep patterns, DU?

Wingsuit Proximity Flying

Yes, it's an old sport, but I like the explanation of how much thought and preparation goes into the planning.

Remember the first time you went wingsuit proximity flying?

Had to Surrender My Dog Today

When we were married, my wife and I had two dogs. Wally loved my wife, and Ellie loved me. When we separated, I took Ellie and she took Wally. That was last summer. Everything seemed fine until this past Saturday. A package of mine was sent to my old address, so I needed to visit my ex. She ended up forcing me to take Wally. With my new living conditions, there was absolutely no way to keep him. And I promise you that I thought of everything. It just wasn't going to work. So, I surrendered him to the same rescue I got him from ten years ago when he was only 7 months old. While we were waiting for the woman to come pick him up, I gave him a goodbye petting. He started licking my hand. Then he was taken away forever.

Do you remember the first time you smoked rubber?

I have only driven cars with weak engines than can't pull the skin off a pudding, so I had to resort to test drives at the dealership. Always a let down when the salesman insists on coming with you.

"tRump is like ________________ ." (Fill in the blank and make a joke)

For example: "tRump is like spring break. No class".

What am I doing? This could get ugly real fast.

Is There A Way I Can Block Myself?

I'm getting really tired of reading my frivolous posts.

When Was the Last Time You Went a Day Without tRump?

Can you remember a full 24 hour period when you did not mention him, think about him, read about him, or hear about him on the radio or TV?

I can't recall a full 24 hour period this happened for me over the last 2.5 years.
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