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skip fox

skip fox's Journal
skip fox's Journal
July 31, 2016

"She ought to be in jail, not on a debate stage." . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!!

Donald ("I love jalapeno enemas&quot Trump is saying: "Listen, the NFL Comission is all over me, hey say I've got to change he debate nights or their televised games will have no viewership. Everybody will be watching me take apart Hillary instead. . . . I'd love to debate her, I really would, but I can't go against real Americans, like those at the NFL, in favor of her, can I? . . . By the way, I would have slaughtered her. . . . It would have been a massacre!!!"


Above CAPTION based on he following Crooks and Liars story:

July 30, 2016

"I've lived a life of deep personal sacrifice!" . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!

Donald (I've been too busy to eat lunch approximately half-a-dozen times a year for over a decade&quot Trump is saying: "Listen, George, that Muslim father at the Democratic Convention who lost his son in Afghanistan. . . Well, he looked like a nice guy, but what does he know about me? . . . He says I haven't made any sacrifices. . . . Where the hell does he get that? . . . I've employed thousands of people and built a marvelous company. . . . Plus, I got more votes in the Republican primaries, than anyone ever. . . . Ever! . . . Talk about sacrifice! . . . All he lost was a son. . . . I mean, I feel sorry for him but, there's really no comparison!"


Aboe CAPTION based on the following ABC interview 7.30.16:

July 30, 2016

"By their deeds ye shall know them." . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!!!

Donald ("The Bible's one hell of a great prop&quot Trump is saying: "What I'm saying, Sean. is that people have no right to judge me by what I have done in the past, including outsourcing, tax evasion, foreign collusions, bankruptcies, trials, and other allegations. . . . I'm telling you straight out, Sean, and you know this to be true, everything will be 360% different when I'm President. . . . Why would any one think otherwise?"

July 30, 2016

"I think the motor just left me running." . . . Please come CAPTION Mike Pence.

Mike ("I'm not wearing any underwear&quot Pence just said: "Name calling has no place in public life."

Reporter then says: "But your running mate, the Republican Presidential candidate, is infamous for calling names."

Mike Pence replies: "But he never held public office. . . . To enter public discourse, you first have to hold public office. . . Everybody knows that."


To confess, all I did was to condense the occasion in which much of this was actually said. That is, I was "scooped by the world" once again. It's getting damned hard to satirize these cut-out clowns since they do so well all on their own. It's a natural talent.

The original line is well recorded:


On television this a.m., I heard that when asked about the apparent hypocrisy, Pence gave a reply that is very close to the CAPTION.

(I feel like a failure.)
July 29, 2016

Twit of the Day. . . . Please come CAPTION Bill O'Reilly!!!

Bill ("I left my heart in the freezer&quot O'Reilly is saying: "Listen, the only reason I started talking about how the slaves who built the White House were well fed and housed and how they weren't the only workers who built it was to flesh out the historical record so everyone could better appreciate Michelle Obama's contention that 'Slaves built the White House.' . . . I certainly didn't bring it up to belittle her or minimize what she said, much less undermine public outrage concerning slavery. . . . What kind of guy do you think I am?"


Above CAPTION based on the following Media Matters story with a clip:


(I think there may be a followup, one a day more recent) in which the twit doubles doubling-down.)

On edit:

Here's, I think, the most recent:

July 28, 2016

"The nuclear codes! Wow! They're worth some real bucks." . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!!

. . .

Donald ("My thugs are better paid than yours&quot Trump is saying: "First, Katy, let me say that I'd give Russia the nuclear codes if it meant bringing Hillary down. . . . And to answer your second question, . . . sure, I think I'd make a great president . . . the best! . . . Now sit down and shut the hell up!"


Above CAPTION based on the following Gawker story with a short (but oh so sweet) clip:

July 27, 2016

"If you get hurt, I'll really falafal." . . . Please come CAPTION Bill O'Reilly!!!

Donald ("My wrists are getting very strong.&quot Trump is saying: "And here's the tip of the day, Michelle; . . . got a paper and pen? . . . The slaves who build the White House got three meals a day, they had health care (because the slave owners were like small business men who would take care of their equipment if they wanted to stay in business), there was no unemployment, and there were no drive by shooting. . . . Doesn't sound so bad, it you really look at it, does it Michelle? . . . And that's the tip of the day, . . . Now why some people are saying Obama is disrespecting America by supporting Hillary over Trump."


Above CAPTION based on the following Fox clip at News Hounds:

July 27, 2016

"Have you taken a look at Putin's hands? They're huge!". . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!!

Donald (I'll show you my tax returns when I get Obama's stool sample&quot Trump is saying: "Now I'm going to speak slowly so the press will understand: I - have - zero - investments - in - Russia! . . . Zilch! . . . None! . . . So I can't think of a single reason the Kremlin would try to help my campaign by leaking hacked DNC documents. . . . I mean, sure, if I was elected Putin would have a friend in the White House who could make great deals with Russia and he has a good idea I'd pull us out of NATO while re-evaluating our relationship with all of our traditional so-called allies, but other than that I can see no reason he'd want me elected. . . . By the way, folks, just between me and you, if Wikileaks dumped another batch today, that'd sure be one more nail in Hillary's coffin."


Above CAPTION based on the following story from The Hill posted at DU:

July 26, 2016

The Alpha City Mouse! . . . Please come CAPTION Donald Trump!!

Donald ("Who needs fact checkers when you got all the facts?&quot Trump is saying: ". . . and old owl-eyed Pocahontas doesn't have anything going for her except her fresh mouth. . . . I believe in gender equality, but when a stupid b*tch like her uses language like that, well . . . It just shows you she hasn't got any judgment . . . She's way too hysterical and nasty to be any sort of viable public figure. . . . It's like she's on the rag 24/7."


Above CAPTION based on the following NewsMax story:

July 26, 2016

"One's man's racist is another man's founding father!" . . . Come CAPTION CNN analyst Harry Houck!!!

Harry ("Even my turds are white&quot Houck is saying: "Of course it's racist when this video directly comes out directly and says that Obama should 'ban all niggras.' . . . That's entirely inappropriate and should be loudly condemned! . . . So it's our job to find another way of putting it."


Above CAPTION based on the following Media Matters story:


Profile Information

Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 19,344

About skip fox

I am retired, now a professor emeritus at University of Louisiana at Lafayette, where I taught in the English department for 37 years. I've written 4 chapbooks and 5 full-sized books (all listed as poetry though many include other genres as well), including _Sheer Indefinite: Selected Poems, 1991-2012 (Univ. of New Orleans Press, 2012). I've also written a 500+ page bibliography of three contemporary poets: Robert Creeley, Ed Dorn, and Robert Duncan. I am writing now, both fiction and poetry, more now than ever. My first vote for President of the United States was for Dick Gregory in 1968 (Bowling Green, Ohio). Favorite quote: "It's easy to be an idealist if you don't have to mind the evidence, but no one said it was supposed to be easy" (Richard LaPauvre).

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