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skip fox

Profile Information

Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 19,084

About Me

I am retired, now a professor emeritus at University of Louisiana at Lafayette, where I taught in the English department for 37 years. I've written 4 chapbooks and 5 full-sized books (all listed as poetry though many include other genres as well), including _Sheer Indefinite: Selected Poems, 1991-2012 (Univ. of New Orleans Press, 2012). I've also written a 500+ page bibliography of three contemporary poets: Robert Creeley, Ed Dorn, and Robert Duncan. I am writing now, both fiction and poetry, more now than ever. My first vote for President of the United States was for Dick Gregory in 1968 (Bowling Green, Ohio). Favorite quote: "It's easy to be an idealist if you don't have to mind the evidence, but no one said it was supposed to be easy" (Richard LaPauvre).

Journal Archives

"How come the other kids all seem to have a good time?" Please come CAPTION Scott Walker!

Scott ("What's Alzheimer's Disease? I forgot." Walker is saying, "Listen, police and firemen are like all other governmental employees. Why should they have unions and no one else? . . . We're introducing a bill at the next sessions to ban all unions! . . .What we really need to do is ban all employee communication and interaction when it comes to discussions of wage, working conditions, vacations, retirement, and whatnot. . . . My lawyers are busy right now trying to draft a law."

"Never enough mirrors!" . . . Please come CAPTION Bill O'Reilly!!!!

Bill ("Each time I open my mouth, I almost disappear" ) O'Reilly is saying: ". . . and the panel that testified before Congress for this so-called 'Discussion on Race' was terribly unbalanced. . . . All three of the participants were far-left zealots who consistently painted the U.S. as hateful and intolerant toward minorities. . . . There was not a single racist on the panel! . . . Not one! . . . No one to stand up for the benefits of discrimination. . . . Can you believe it? . . . And that's the memo. . . Stay tuned for a fair-and-balanced debate with Ted Nugent. . . . The topic? . . . Is Obama evil or criminally insane?"

Fox's Lauren Green teaches Reza Aslan some scholarship, you bet. Come CAPTION Ms. Running-on-Empty!

Lauren ("I can never figure out what I'm missing" Green is saying: "You can't seriously believe that anyone will swallow that! . . . No Muslim scholar, so called, can be objective or provide a substantial intelligent perspective on Christianity, much less Jesus. . . . It's just not in your genes. . . . Whereas a Christian scholar is raised in a culture that respects true objectivity and intellectual prowess. . . . What do you have to say to that? . . . Quickly please, I've only got 12 seconds to a hard break."

"Something's wrong with my mirror." . . . Please come CAPTION Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity!!!!

Rush ("Never too many lies" Limbaugh and Sean ("Hit the hammer on the head" Hannity both just finished saying (in concert): "Listen, we're not worried about losing the Cumulus contract. We were thinking about leaving their puny 40 stations anyway. . . . Cumulus wasn't good enough for us. . . . They could only think about the bottom line, not the truth. . . . This is what happens to prophets crying in the wilderness. . . . Anyway, there were too many commercials. . . . And the liberals and child-killing progressives threatened to boycott our sponsors. . . . What can you expect from whiners who never take responsibility for themselves. . . . All they have are excuses and hate. . . . Always blaming someone else for their pitiful lives!!"

"Why, oh why, don't they want me?" Please come CAPTION Anthony Weiner!!!

Anthony ("If I'm speaking I'm not on Twitter" Weiner is saying: "To answer your question: There weren't more than six to eight others, I don't mean incidents, I mean people, not counting inquiries, suggestions, and what I call 'phone-flashes' or 'toned flatteries.' Depending of course what one wishes to call inappropriate. . . . Like is it inappropriate to simply give specs for a 3D printer? . . . That's more like math, like homework. . . . Or is it inappropriate to share a little adventure with my friend as the lead character, dressing him in little suits and uniforms and towels and stuff for the different shots? . . . Is it inappropriate if they can't see your face, like if you're in the buff with a clown-face doing silly things. Is that inappropriate? . . . Like I said not more than eight or ten, if you don't count. . . ."

"Can I get a second mortgage on my soul, please?" Please come CAPTION Megyn Kelly!!!

Megyn (The piece-of-work's piece-of-work) Kelly is saying: "And in our next segment we'll examine the question: Is Obama crazy or evil? . . . And just which of his actions come from his being evil, and which from just being crazy? . . . Stay on Fox . . . Fair and balanced as always!!"

Making minds out of molehills. Please come CAPTION Mr. Bill O'Reilly!!!!

Bill (The American Pope) O'Reilly is saying: "And the nasty little secret is that there is no racism in America today! . . . . Let me say that again there is no racism in America today! . . . At least not to the extent that the racism merchants would have you believe. . . . Oh, there might be a couple dozen racists in every state, but they are far from common. . . . They as rare as an honest liberal. . . . And every thinking African American alive today knows that's the absolute truth . . . . Or at least they would know it if they'd stop smoking dope, acting out, pimping their baby momas, gambling and drinking, shuck-jiving, busting caps, and listening to rap music, and so on."

Someone forgot to take out the garbage. Please come CAPTION The Donald!!

"Listen, Anthony Weiner is really just sick, sick, sick. . . . At this point the best he can hope to be is an example of what someone looks like who is a flaming egoist with terrible tastes and superficial priorities and who can't stop trying get in the public eye! . . . Can you imagine such a spruced-up piece of fecal matter?"

If summer comes, can winter be for behinds? Please come CAPTION Head Wreck (Glenn Beck)!!!

Glenn ("My talking dog gives me sage advice" Beck is saying: "It's important for our audience to know that they're listening to a reasonable person, . . . someone sane of thought as well as appearance . . . Someone temperate and moderate. . . . Someone who can survive on barb-wire and song. . . . Someone who can read the alien messages in clouds. . . . Someone with the Masonic secret for walking through walls and who can conduct improvised operas. . . . . . .Heck, people can take just one look at me and know exactly what they're dealing with! "

Through the looking glass's looking glass. Please come CAPTION Rush Limbaugh!!!!

Rush ("Integrity is just a nine-letter word" Limbaugh is saying: "That's the truth nobody will tell you! . . . Caucasians trafficked in slavery for a shorter period than any other race in the history of the planet. . . . That's not saying slavery was good. It wasn't. . . . But by gum, the slaves over here had it pretty damned good, comparatively. . . . They had white owners who were small business men, and like small businessmen everywhere, they tried to keep their equipment in good working order. . . . Thus the slaves had something even better than food stamps or health care insurance: they had real food and doctors! . . . Right there! . . . . Makes you wonder just who owes who the reparations, doesn't it? . . . I'm waiting for Obama to cut me a check!!!"

On edit:

The second sentence in the CAPTION was actually said by this waste of human space.
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